Naked Truth
by KayEsse
Summary: Spock can't stand Jim throwing himself to every pretty girl that comes his way. Especially, when Spock knows him better than they do. Jim deep down is tired of chasing them. Will Spock tell Jim how he feels?
1. Chapter 1

Another social function, another pretty girl to show around the Enterprise. It was something that James Kirk was growing tired of. His job was often to wine and dine the representative in charge of whatever planetary body they had to convince to join the Federation and to make things run smoothly.

Usually, that body belonged to some beautiful woman. It always felt awkward. But, he did it, it was his duty. What he really wanted was something real, something substantial.

James Kirk never thought of himself as someone who could commit to a long term relationship. They seemed to always end up in disaster.

Deep down, Jim realized why it wasn't working. He wasn't compatible with them. They didn't make him happy. Well, they would for a bit, but the novelty would wear off pretty quick.

James Kirk had bid farewell to one of those beautiful woman, as he exited her quarters. He slowly walked back to his cabin when he decided to go see Spock instead.

He buzzed Spock's room, and moments later it opened.

"I hope I'm not bothering you Spock. Just came back from.."

"Yes, I know, Captain." Spock replied. Was there anger laced in his response?

"I'm beginning to get tired of this song and dance." Jim replied, his voice showing his fatigue.

"What do you wish of me, sir.?" Spock's voice sounded strange to Jim's ears.

"Are you all right, Spock?" Jim replied worry etched on his brow.

Spock turned around, not facing Jim, and spoke.

"What is the purpose of this visit?" Spock's voice was laced with tension.

"All right. That's it. What's wrong?" Jim's voice had no longer any concern for Spock's feelings. He wanted to know why his first officer was being snippy with him.

"There is nothing to be said. I, have nothing to say."

"You're angry with me. Why?" Jim continued to speak, but all he got was Spock's back.

"Anger is an emotion. I am not.."

"Come on Spock. The moment I entered your room, I could feel there was something wrong. I also get the impression, that it has to do with me."

"How very astute, Captain."

"Spock, what the hell is a matter with you?" Jim turned Spock around, only to see Spock's face wet with tears.

"You're crying?" Jim replied, astonishment written on his face.

"I wish for you to leave."

"No, not until you tell me, what's wrong?"

"I do not believe you will understand or accept what I have to say?" Spock replied his voice calmer.

"Try me?" Jim replied his voice pleading.


	2. Chapter 2

Spock's quarters has always been overly warm. At least that was the norm when Jim would visit for a game of chess, or to discuss ships business.

Tension was very high at the moment, but for some strange reason, Jim felt cold fear. Something that couldn't be explained. Perhaps, he was imagining it. Still, he shivered with the uncertainty before him.

Why was Spock acting the way he was? To shed tears is an emotional reaction. Why did James Kirk feel he was the cause? He needed to know why. He wasn't leaving without an answer.

Spock could feel the steel grip of Jim's hands upon his arms. He was careless. He should have not reacted so emotionally when Jim entered. Now, Jim saw evidence of that loss. Shameful tears that ran down his face. How could he explain what he couldn't define. The loss of control. Jim demanded answers. He wasn't sure he had any to give him.

"Please Jim, let me go." Spock said softly.

"Will you tell me what's wrong?" Jim asked again.

Spock nodded.

Jim slowly let go of Spock's arms.

Spock pulled down his uniform tunic, and made himself stand much straighter than he was a moment ago. He truly needed to get his control back.

"Your evening with the young lady did not go as planned?" Spock asked, trying desperately to change the subject.

"I see what you're doing Spock, and it won't work."

"This is not a good time for me, Jim. May we speak of this tomorrow?"

"I'd rather talk about it now."

"I... need to meditate, and find the words I need to say. At the moment, I have none."

"Very well, Spock. Tomorrow."

"Thank you." Spock said softly.

Jim headed towards the door. He turned back for a moment not knowing what he should say. He could feel something was wrong with Spock, but he decided he wouldn't press him.

"Goodnight Spock." Jim said quickly and left.

Spock knew Jim wouldn't let go of this until he knew the truth.

Spock prepared to meditate.


	3. Chapter 3

Captain Kirk was not a happy man. Spock had promised him answers to his display of emotion yesterday, and it hadn't happened. He got an excuse stating that he had many tasks to accomplish and he'd have to re-schedule. Jim could plainly see that Spock was giving him the runaround.

The captain realized pressing the issue wasn't going to solve anything. Spock would come around eventually, so he let it go for now. Still, it bothered him. The woman the captain wined and dined last night was a mere memory. She was no longer on the ship. Everything had gone well with the treaty, however Jim wondered was it really worth it? The treaty was important, what Jim questioned was the motives around it. Why did it seem to always end up this way? If the ambassador had been a man...

Jim needed to unwind and the best place for him to do that was seeing his good friend Doctor McCoy. A bit of small talk and a few drinks, he was sure he'd feel better in no time. Jim was about to leave his quarters when the door buzzer rang. Perhaps, it was Spock after all wanting to talk. Instead he was greeted by the good doctor himself.

Jim smiled as he noticed the good doctor did not come empty handed.

"Bones, I didn't know you were a mind reader?" Jim said, staring at the bottle his friend was holding.

"Now, why would you say that?" McCoy smiled back knowing what he meant.

"Long day?" McCoy asked as he poured his friend a drink.

"As usual. Yourself?" Jim asked taking the glass.

"Oh, the usual. A few bumps and bruises, with one exception." McCoy said as he sat down and took a sip of his glass.

"What happened?" Jim asked curiously.

"I got a visitor last night. Care to guess who it was."

"I haven't the foggiest."

" I'll give you a hint." McCoy said smiling.

"Okay. Shoot." Jim said waiting patiently wondering who was this mysterious visitor.

"This individual claimed that sleep eluded him and that he couldn't meditate. Oh, and he has pointed ears."

"You're kidding me." Jim said surprised.

"No, I'm quite sure about the pointed ears." McCoy said laughing.

"Bones!" Jim said, annoyed by the doctor's lack of respect.

"Sorry. I just don't see Spock very often in sickbay. Usually I have to drag him there kicking and screaming. Come to think of it, you have that in common with him as well."

"What did you give him?"

"Just something for him to relax. He seems uptight about something."

"I see." Jim said knowing all too well what that something was. Well, to a degree.

"Well, I can't say much due to patient confidentiality, but I'm worried about him. Would you know anything about what is bothering him Jim?"

Jim downed his glass.

"I'm afraid not Doctor." Jim replied matter of fact.

"Well, I guess all we can do is wait and see." McCoy said as he finished his drink and got up.

"Leaving so soon Bones?"

"Need to get up early tomorrow. I have some surgeries scheduled. Nothing serious."

"Thanks for the drink and the company."

"No problem. Goodnight Jim."

McCoy left Jim's quarters leaving the captain feeling uneasy.

He had to talk to Spock and find out the whole truth.


	4. Chapter 4

Jim felt this pain in his gut. Actually, it felt more like uneasiness and it was preventing him from getting a good night's sleep. He tossed and turned, but any position he took sleep eluded him. He was even considering getting those red pills that his Chief Surgeon usually doled out.

Jim lay in his bed and stared at the ceiling, thinking about Spock. That was it of course, the reason he couldn't sleep. Spock was on his mind and it was bothering him that he didn't get the answers he was promised. Sitting up in his bed he thought for a moment and came to a decision. If his friend wasn't coming to him then it was time Jim made the first move. He swore to himself that he wasn't going to leave without an answer.

Jim got up, went to the fresher and splashed some cold water on his face. He looked at himself in the mirror and realized that he looked tired. All this business of Spock reacting like he did was getting to him. Even though Jim had made his decision to see Spock and get those answers, he was getting nervous about what he was going to find out. Was Spock sick? Did McCoy know more about the situation and he wasn't telling him. So many questions but no answers. It was now or never. Jim left his quarters seconds later.

Spock's Cabin

Spock played his lyre to calm his mind. It usually had the desired effect, but this evening it was just not meant to be. He left the lyre and retired to his bed. Deep down he knew sleep would not come. He lay on his side and eventually turned on his back. Spock closed his eyes and tried to relax, but to no avail, too many things were on his mind. He had lied to Jim. Lying was illogical but he had done it anyway. He was not busy when Jim had asked him for those answers. He felt like blaming his human side for the incident, but he couldn't because that Vulcan half of his was in on it as well.

So the question was: Why? Why not tell him the truth? Spock didn't even know what that truth was. Could it be fear? Fear was illogical, something else to add to Spock's list. Spock had told Jim that he couldn't explain, had no words for how he reacted. Meditation had not worked and the doctor was no help either. All McCoy did was ask questions he had no answers for.

Spock couldn't continue like this and came to a decision. He had to see Jim. He wasn't sure what he was going to say but he was determined to see his friend and 'talk'. Perhaps, the truth would finally come out in the end.

He hoped he wasn't going to intrude at this late hour, but deep down he had a feeling that Jim wasn't sleeping either.

Spock got up and headed for the door. Just as the doors opened Jim stood there.

"Spock, we need to talk." Jim said.

"Agreed." Spock said calmly.


End file.
